What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
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