i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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