Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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