Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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