is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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