I just threw up on my dentist
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize