Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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