just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
