spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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