Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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