But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
