if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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