i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize