Apparently you make a good broom.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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