Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
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