i may or may not be watching the land before time
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Randomize
