Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
