I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
There r osticjed everywhere
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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