hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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