Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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