oh fat girl friday strikes again...
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Randomize
