dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
