4 words: hood of his car
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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