No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize