i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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