Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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