that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business