god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
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