I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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