The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
did i just pee glitter
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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