i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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