At least make sure they are 18
Why
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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