Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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