Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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