he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
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