I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
it's not cheating when I paid for it
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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