love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Randomize
