Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

you are hot. that is all.

(1-480): View more from Arizona

who is this?

(480): View more from Arizona

the delivery driver from silvermine.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.

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(614): View more from Ohio

I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner

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(830): View more from Texas

You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(770): View more from Georgia

Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight

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(503): View more from Oregon

Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees

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(714): View more from California

I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.

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(720): View more from Colorado

You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.

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