I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.