My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
