What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Randomize
