i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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