walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
