Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
she told me i tasted like america
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
