The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
as a side note pls kill me
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
