Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
