why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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