im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
