I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
