Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
My life is pants optional.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
