I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize