Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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