ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
they need to just BURY HIM!
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
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